Back To School Is Not As Cool

As we approach the end of summer I find myself with a strange feeling…I’m not ready for it to be over. This is a departure from where I usually find myself in the beginning of August. I have for years enjoyed the summer, but been very ready when the school year rolls around. So, I’m not sure what’s happening, but dare I say—I think I could use a few more weeks with my kids?!

Summer Lover

Now, first let me start by saying I am not one of those moms that hates summer. I’m not a mom that thinks, “what am I going to do with them all summer?” One who dreads the idea of their kids being at home constantly in need of entertainment, food, camp counselor duties, and general supervision. Well, let’s be honest, I’m not fan of the last part either, but the trade off is worth it to me. The trade off, for me, is getting off the wheel—the wheel of homework, after school activities, lunches, projects, band concerts—I’m already getting tired.

I subscribe to the belief that summer is the time do NOTHING. We don’t sign up for sports, we don’t go to camp; nothing is planned but our family vacation. I feel this way because the nine other months of the year we do ALL the things. The things are awesome and we all enjoy them. But, the things can be a lot, the things can make us tired, so we take a break.

Older And Wiser

I also think that the ages of my children have a lot to do with my new-found love for the summer. You see, when your child gets up without waking you, makes their own breakfast and doesn’t involve you—you’re living your best life. You can sleep in, you can get up and have a leisurely cup of coffee while reading a book in another room—it’s almost like being a full- blown adult. The fact that older children don’t require as much constant supervision is a summer game changer. People tell you about it, but you have to see it to believe it, like Big Foot or The Loch Ness Monster. But, like these phenomena, once you see it, you can’t un-see it. You’ve been to the mountain and you know what it holds. It holds leisure, it holds uninterrupted sleep, it holds freedom.

Older child summer parenting is much more like being a referee; you let the game play out and only get involved when there is an egregious violation of the rules. If one of my children physically harms another, I’ll get involved. If you’ve been playing video games so long I can see your body imprinted on the couch when you sprint to the bathroom, I’ll have to cut you off. But, if you ate two granola bars and called it lunch—I’ll allow it.

You see, summer mom is way cooler because she doesn’t have to do all of the things either. I don’t care about the protein/carb/ fat ratio of your lunch because your little brain has to be at school for six hours and perform. I don’t care if you got toothpaste all over your shirt because we may not leave the house today or you’re just going to put on a swimsuit in twenty minutes anyway. I’m easy, I’m breezy, I’m nothing like school year mom.

Going, Going, Gone

The flip side of these older somewhat easier summer kiddos is that they’re running out of summers. And, while I’m not super mushy or nostalgic because I have three kids (which is basically like a hundred kids) you can’t help but start counting—1 more summer of elementary school, 6 more summers until they’re in college. It crosses your mind that this time is fleeting. You think that watching movies at 2:00 in the afternoon on a Wednesday with all of your people seems like a great idea because soon they’ll want to be at the movies with their friends. Letting them stay up way to late because you were outside all day and you didn’t even start dinner until 7:00 p.m. is ok because you had all that time just to hang out. Once your kids start school, summer is the only non-scheduled time you have with them.

Better Together

Which brings me to my next observation–my kids may actually like each other. This is a revelation that could not be surmised from any of their during-the-school-year behaviors. Everyone is so busy moving in their own direction during the year, that summer is also the only time (if you have more than one child) that your kids get to hang out with each other. Look, I get that we’re all here during the school year doing all kinds of family togetherness, but it’s different.

It’s different. During the school year your kids spend most of their waking day in their classroom or participating in their specific activities—very few of these overlap with siblings. They go to birthday parties with their peer group, they play sports with kids their age and take piano lessons solo. So, the all-day interaction is unique to the summer scene. The “we’re out of video game time so let’s think of something to play”, the laughing with and at each other because they realize that their brother/sister is actually kind of funny, the bonding over the unfortunate fact that their mother, is not that funny—this is what summer does for siblings.

Please don’t misunderstand, it’s not all unicorns and rainbows. There is fighting, yelling, time-outs, electronic bans (this generation’s form of slow death), there are chores that no one can seem to “remember” to do. There are a million frustrating things about having all of this humanity under one roof for a few months. I simply submit that the scale evens out a bit as they get older.

See Ya Summer

So, as August begins and we get ready to wrap this summer up, I find myself wanting more. A few more weeks of giggles from the other room, of lazing around in your jammies, of not having to be the warden about schedules and bedtimes, would be great. But, time and the school year wait for no man, so I’ll just try to enjoy it. I’ll try to stop figuring out when it became kind of fun. I’ll just be grateful that no one was seriously injured in the daily wrestling matches, nobody’s brain actually turned to mush from the use of electronics, and apparently you can sustain life by only eating things found in our pantry.

So long, summer, you’ve been a good friend to us—until next time.