Sick Daze

As we find ourselves at the height of cold and flu season, I feel it’s important to bring light to one of the most challenging parts of motherhood—sick kids. Please understand when I say“sick” I am speaking of normally healthy children who have taken ill with a common cold, flu, strep, stomach virus, hand, foot and mouth (insert your favorite illness here). Usually, these little gems are picked up at the second dirtiest place on earth—school. Which, unfortunately, lands you in the absolute dirtiest, germ-infested place on earth—the pediatrician’s office. We’ve all been there, but it’s like a brand-new fresh hell every time—sick kids are the WORST!

I have just done a 4-day stint that included two children, one case of strep and two different antibiotics and I can confirm that nothing brings mama down faster than a sick kiddo. Now, of course, no one wants their child unwell. It breaks your heart when you have to look at their sad little eyes, runny noses or heaving tummies. That all goes without saying. No mother wants her baby to feel bad. But, let’s focus on what’s important here and that’s how a sick kid can ruin your life (temporarily).

I’m one of the lucky ones. The strep diagnosis is gold! It’s easily treated and your little person starts feeling better within 24 hours. It’s like the jackpot of infections. I actually fist pumped in my pediatrician’s exam room when she told us—she has kids; she gets it. Where you really get hit is the mysterious “virus” that has no known cure and no estimated duration. Thus, leaving you with not even a grain of hope about when you might be able to rejoin your regularly scheduled life.

Or, you could get the Queen Mother of Sicknesses—the flu.  A? B? Stomach? They’re all awful. They come on fast; they hit hard and they take no prisoners. They’re also not your typical “kid” illness. No, no the flus discriminate against no one. So, once they enter into your life, look out! Once you’ve got one person infected, the suspense and fear immediately begin to build. Everyone in your family quarantines themselves. It’s a human survival, Hunger Games type situation. Anyone could go down at any time. You do your best to preserve yourself while you wait to see which family member’s image appears in the sky as the next one taken.

Self-preservation is crucial if you’re a mother. Not only do you have to take care of the infirmed, but you also have to create a super human shield of immunity so that you don’t fall prey to whatever nastiness they’ve brought upon your home. You arm yourself with Lysol, hand sanitizer and you pray. You pray that you are spared. This is not a selfish prayer. Quite the opposite, this is a prayer for everyone, for the greater good.  Let’s face it, these people are barely making it now and their chances of survival if you are down for two to five days with any various, sundry ailment are slim—closer to none.

You will not get to enjoy being spared. It’s always better to be well than sick, sure. But binge watching historical romances and online shopping from the comfort of your bed would not be the worst way to spend a few days. You won’t get to do any of that. If you’re well, you’ll be running around soothing and sanitizing. If you get sick, you will be left alone to rest for about 2 minutes longer than it actually takes your body to feel good enough to drag yourself out of bed. Your family will be respectful if you’re really down for the count. But as soon as you show any signs of recovery, you will be asked to locate everything in your house that they haven’t been able to find in the last 48 hours. You will hobble out of your bed to discover every dish and article of clothing that was used during your sick leave in a pile of some sort strewn about your home.  It’s sort of like walking out to an apocalypse. At this point, I suggest you turn around and go back to bed—it’s the only place that’s safe for you.

We haven’t even touched on what happens to your actual life, yet. Just press stop. Hit the pause button, sister because you will be able to get NOTHING done until everyone is well. You can get  mandatory things done like pukey laundry, soup and cracker preparation or a pharmacy run, other than that, you’re toast. You’ll try. You’ll convince yourself that you can be a nursemaid and still try to have a phone conversation—and then someone will begin running to the bathroom to vomit. So, do yourself a favor and just give up. As soon as patient zero goes down, just call it. Flip right to the next week in your planner (don’t judge me, I’m Type A and over 40 and LOVE a paper planner!) and start moving things because this week—it’s over. Even if the sickness is blessedly short-lived, when you resume life, you’ll have tons of make-up work. Oh, and you’ll also have to help your children with all of their actual make-up work, so yeah, just flip to next week and give it up to God.

As with all things motherhood, all you can do is your best. Try to embrace the break in your crazy life. Maybe you get out of some sports practices? That’s not all bad. Perhaps you get to sleep an extra fifteen minutes since no one is going to school? Count that as a win. Love on your little sickos, get some snuggles (even the big ones will cooperate when they don’t feel well) and hope everyone is better tomorrow. Keep your head up, your hand sanitizer at the ready and try not to breathe around them. Stay healthy mammas!